JOY is divine…

Joy comes from within.  I bet many of us have heard this statement a million times, but we’ve never been more tested to discover it, explore it and apply than at this point in the world.  As COVID19 looms on, most of us have been in a lockdown stuck in our own homes either alone or with our families.  We are being forced to do almost everything differently.  As a result, we are starting to see headlines that outline an instability in mental health.  Some of this is due to our appetite for things, places and people which has been stripped away.  Could it be that some of us have relied too heavily on the external world to bring us joy?  And so, now that it’s been stripped away, we are miserable, bored, anxious and our mental health is unstable. 

Where have you placed your joy?

When we experience change or loss, we have the harsh discovery of where we put our joy.  If we put all our joy in people, things or places for example, instead of finding it from within we are left feeling empty when any of those external things are taken away.  This could be what many people are feeling now.

The Universe is shaking us up… were you prepared internally?

I have to admit that even I was a little down recently and seemed to have temporarily misplaced my joy.  I checked my purse, it wasn’t there, I checked my car, not there, I checked my home, not there either, I checked my husband, my dogs, my children, and my joy was nowhere to be found.  I even checked the desk where I work every day and still, I couldn’t find it.  I did start pining over not being able to get out amongst people, shop frivolously, eat at a restaurant and gather with friends.  The weather was cold in my neck of the woods, which didn’t help either.  Did I somehow connect all of these things to my own joy?  I recognized quickly how much we place the existence of our joy on other people, or on places and on doing or getting things instead of on our inner being.    

Joy is not “out there” somewhere.  You can be doing many things, be with many people, and go anywhere and still feel alone or miserable inside.  Now that we’ve been forced to be with ourselves without much distraction, the truth of where our joy has been placed is coming out.

If you’ve lost your joy or placed it on external things, people or places, it’s no wonder you can’t feel any amount of peace or happiness during a time like this. I am not saying that we have to be happy about our circumstances if they are truly undesirable, but even so, that does not have to rob us of our joy. 

I have found that joy is about perspective and attitude.  If our perspective is that we cannot be joyful amongst the thorns of life, then we won’t.  If our attitude is that we refuse to be joyful during times of trial, then we won’t.  Joy is also about where you focus your personal energy and attention.  If you focus your energy and attention on things you cannot have, or on the past, or the future which is unknown or on people who may not behave the way we wish all the time, then when things don’t go the way we want, we have no joy.

What is Joy anyway?

I think Oprah Winfrey says it best…“Joy is a sustained sense of well-being and internal peace – a connection to what really matters.”

So how do we find and keep inner joy?

LOVE YOURSELF

To love yourself means many things for different people.  For you it might mean letting go of a hurtful past, a toxic relationship, or forgiving yourself, or maybe it’s just about accepting yourself, flaws and all.  It could mean taking proper physical care of your body.  Just as there are many actions to take when loving someone else, we need to take some of those same actions in order to love ourselves properly.  What actions do you need to take to love yourself more?

TAKE A POSITIVE PERSPECTIVE

Change your perspective from negative to positive and you will immediately find a glimpse of inner joy.  Look deeply at situations and scope out all the positives and focus on the things in your life you are grateful for.  Continue to do this in each difficult situation and joy will appear more often and become more stable in your life.  How can you change your perspective to be more positive in difficult situations?

HAVE A HOPEFUL ATTITUDE

Hope is a good friend of Joy.  They love to hang out together.  Invite an attitude of hope instead of doom and dread and you will see Joy wants to tag along.  As Joyce Meyer puts it, “Hope is the expectation that something good is going to happen.”  Be hopeful in your attitude in everything you do even when things don’t seem to be going the way you planned.  Remove the toxic thoughts in your life.  Move forward in life with hope and faith that everything will work out for the greater good even when it doesn’t feel like it at the moment.  How has your attitude been blocking you from joy? 

JOY IS IN THE GIVING

There is a sustaining joy that appears when you give to others.  This involves taking the focus off of yourself to determine how you can be of service to others.  It doesn’t have to be complicated or fancy.  It can be as simple as giving someone a word of encouragement or taking interest in another person’s life.  Giving of your “time” is one of the most precious gifts and makes others feel loved.  There is a lasting joy when you know you’ve made a positive difference in someone else’s life.  Look for ways to give to others without any strings attached.  Start with your own family and you will see an immediate return.  Whose life can you make a positive difference in today?

FIGURE OUT WHAT REALLY MATTERS IN LIFE

If you are typically unhappy or anxious, chances are, all the things you thought or think really matter in life are the very things that are taking your joy away.  I won’t say much more because this is truly thought provoking and personal to each one of us and I encourage you to ponder on this thought and see what it reveals to you personally. What are you trying desperately to achieve, seek or obtain that is only bringing you frustration?  Is it really that important or are there other things in life that matter more?

It’s not in the “doing” that we find our joy, it’s in the “being” – our inner “being”.  It’s not found in other people, it’s not in our jobs, our status on the corporate ladder, our appearances or in the material things we think will make us happy.  All of those are non-sustaining and give us a false sense of joy which wears off quickly when we are tested to give them up or when they don’t work out as planned.  Inner joy is stable and rides out storms with us.  It's an internal peace that comes from a divine place.  We may lose it temporarily, but when it’s inside you, it’s easier to find when you feel you’ve lost it and no one can take it away without your permission.

Stay joyful,

Sheri