Are you CONTENT? …

The world is such a busy place these days and it seems like so many of us are rushing around all over the place.  We may rush around physically to get to and from a job, take care of children, run a business, have a career or deal with an illness.  We even rush around within the confines of our own minds dealing with our own anxieties and competing priority lists.  It’s not the rushing that is the greatest concern but rather the reason we are doing so much rushing that has me thinking, is anyone content these days? 

Content people experience a state of peaceful happiness, or feel satisfied, pleased and fulfilled most of the time.  Does that describe you most of the time?  If it doesn’t, you are not alone.

Contentment seems to be missing for so many of us.  We wish for things that are just not within our reach and want things that we just can’t have and hope for things that will never be. 

Are you happy or content with the here and now?  With the situations you are in?  With all that you do have?  Or do you spend most of your time wanting something that’s not within your grasp and may never be?  Are you constantly unsettled and anxious?  Are you rushing after things in the hopes of fulfillment? 

Don’t get me wrong, I would never say that we should stop dreaming big or pushing forward or striving further.  I have spent my life with this mindset so I would never suggest we just drop our dreams, hop on the couch and wait for the world to pass us by.  However, too many of us are so busy chasing the dream that we have forgotten how to simply be content, live in the moment and be grateful for all the blessings in the present. 

Can you sit still, not thinking of anything, just using every sense you have to absorb and be content with the moment?  This is probably one of the most difficult tasks for people.  It’s called meditation and people these days are craving to achieve this kind of momentary peace and contentment.  People will pay money for others to teach them how to just simply relax enough so that the body and mind aren’t racing a mile a minute.  When I think about it that way, it almost sounds crazy.  Have we become so out of balance and unhappy that we cannot even rest our minds for a few minutes?

Do you lack a sense of contentment in your life?   If so…

Here’s 7 easy things you can do:

1. Get back in CONTROL of YOUR own SCHEDULE.  You are the only one who can control whether you say “yes” or “no” in a day.  If you over-commit or overload yourself, you will burn out quick and will feel a constant pressure making you discontent in everything you do.  Learn to say “No!” to the tasks and people that drag you down, wear you out and don’t bring you any joy.  Learn to say “Yes!” to the simple things in life that will be good for a balanced life and the things that really matter in this world, not the things others perceive as important.

2. Dust off the GRATITUDE attitude.  Much of our discontentment stems from forgetting to look around and be thankful for all the things we do have.  I went to a workshop once and a life coach of mine took a large white sheet of paper and put a single small black dot in the middle of it with a sharpie marker.  She asked what everyone saw when they looked at the paper.  The majority of people immediately pointed out the single black dot on the paper.  She found it interesting that with all that lovely white background and open space we always tend to only see and focus on the black dot.  We often forget that we do have so much to be grateful for in our lives – no matter our circumstances.  We lose sight of the good when we put our main focus on the things we don’t like about our lives or on the things we wish we had.  It’s hard not to focus on the things we don’t have or the undesirable circumstances we may be facing and it takes work to shift our attitude to one of gratitude.  We can choose what to focus on.  I believe this is a constant effort in today’s busy world.  When we overlook the good that exists in our lives, we can become discontent.  Are you overlooking all the good?  Be grateful on purpose!

3. Make an ATTITUDE ADJUSTMENT.  Sometimes we are discontent because our attitude just plain stinks about what we do in a day or who we have to be with.  If that’s the case, change it!  If you can’t change your circumstances and you can’t change who you are around, then change your own attitude about all of it.  Our attitude is really like a switch and we have the power to switch it from negative to positive or from positive to negative in a single moment. No one else can do this for you.  You’re in control of the switch – so turn it to positive.  Stop dragging around feeling depressed and down or angry and resentful.  Stop blaming others or living in jealousy.  Get your mind on to the things you have control over, one of them being your own attitude!

4. STOP COMPLAINING!  If you really start to analyze what you say in a day, this just might hit a sore spot.  So many of us just bark out the complaints on auto pilot.  We have become so used to complaining that we don’t even know when we do it!  Become aware of your own words.  You can complain about things that are beyond your control or you can take an action whether it’s big or small towards what you want to see and feel in your life.  Complaining never changes anything but actions do, even little ones.  If you feel a complaint brewing up inside you, remember the blessings in your life, remember to stay positive with your attitude and your words and remember that complaining gets you no closer to being content with your life.  Change what you have the power to change and let go of the rest. 

5. EMBRACE YOUR TALENTS and your purpose will be revealed.  You are born with gifts – unique gifts.  We all have them.  Each person has something to offer the world in the here and now.  We can utilize our gifts in any setting at any time.  This is where so many people miss the mark.  We often wait for others to point out our talents through acknowledgment or compliments and when we don’t get them, we are highly discontent and lose our motivation.  Your talents aren’t defined by some outside source.  In addition, we think that our talents may be defined by some fancy degree or job title or accomplishment in the world.  They are not and it’s not that complicated.  Gifts can be simple.  We can possess the gift of being a good friend, a good listener, a motivator, someone who inspires others and so on.  We can be gifted as a humble leader or teacher or as an eager student.  We can be gifted in our abilities to create or invent – but the measure of success is something we often dream up as an ideal that the world sets.  This is where we end up discontent even if we are using our talents.  Your purpose is revealed in each moment that you utilize your true talents and gifts.  You will feel a passion or positive energy when this happens.  That’s how you know you’re embracing your own talents and not waiting on the world.  The world is a highly competitive place that makes people believe they aren’t good enough or talented if they don’t achieve a certain status quo.  Not true!  So, shift your set of beliefs from what the world has you thinking talent means and find the gifts you have inside and once you do, offer them up by doing what you love, what makes you happy and by being the person you desire to be.

6. SEEK PEACE.  Sometimes when we want something we have to go out and seek it.  To do that we may have to change some old habits and form new ones.  We may have to change friends, or make new ones and we may have to do some hard work on the inside of ourselves to break free from the strong holds in our lives.  The strong holds hold us back from really having contentment.  They can consist of past hurts, unforgiveness, past mistakes, narrow visions and a lack of awareness.  To have peace, we have to do the work to get it.  Sometimes the work is physical like changing homes or moving, changing jobs, changing friends, carving out quiet time for yourself and sometimes the work is internal in our spirit and we have to work through our past and change old habits or ways of thinking and sometimes to do this we need to seek help.  Peace is the doorway to contentment, but it doesn’t just land on your lap, you have to seek it. 

7. Learn to LOVE YOURSELF.  Do you love yourself?  Do you even like yourself?  I am not talking in a conceded way, but deep down inside you have to love yourself in order to ever experience long term contentment.  You will only feel momentary satisfaction if you don’t. So how do we love ourselves?   That may mean clearing out the damage from your past that affected your self-esteem.  I believe that love is an action and so, to love ourselves we need to take certain actions.  We need to take action to care for our physical bodies.  We need to take action to take care of our spirit.  We need to take action to take care of our minds and thoughts.  We need to start thinking good thoughts about ourselves.  If you wanted to encourage a friend who is feeling down, what would you say to them?  That’s what you have to start doing with yourself.  Be everything to yourself that you wish others would be.  Don’t wait for others to do what you can do for yourself.  This will take action on your part and may mean you have to take some unfamiliar or uncomfortable steps, but I encourage you to do it if you want long term contentment.

The world is such a busy place and everyone seems to be trying to figure out one step to the next, forgetting about the present moment and all that it has to offer.  Everyone is so busy and yet so many people are not happy.  Happiness or contentment doesn’t come from a job, another person, having things or living some “ideal” the world values as important.  We can have all the best in life and still be discontent.  We can have all the best people in our lives and still be discontent.  Some people like the busyness because they don’t have time to face their unhappiness, but it is making them miserable and they have no real peace. 

Contentment isn’t out there some where in the world, it’s already in you just waiting to be awakened! 

Contentment is a daily commitment.

Sheri